Do Australians Have The Right to Vote For Co-Citizens To Have The Same Rights They Have?
Elections were never meant for allowing people to have have the same benefits as others. Elections are for the majority to rule and the majority is not always right about allowing people to have the same as theirs. Majorities can be hateful, can be selfish. Voting for a government are the inentions of elections to have the majority of those who vote to choose their leaders but not for human rights or benefits for fellow citizens. For that you have the legislature and the courts. The legislature is suppose to rule not on the majority wishes but on what is fair and equitable for the cittizens. Adam🦊
IT’S their favourite Gogglebox moment, and also the most bittersweet.
More than a year ago, as Gogglebox’s gay couple Wayne and Tom watched two men marry in New Zealand on reality show Married at First Sight, Wayne reached out to grab Tom’s hand.
“Ahh, are you getting romantic?” asked Tom.
“No,” man mountain Wayne said, “it’s making me sad.”
Tom asked why.
Voice breaking, fighting tears Wayne replied: “It’s Mum’s birthday on Saturday, and it’s the one thing she wanted, was to see us married, and we’re never going to get to do it.”
Tom looked his partner of 17 years in the eyes, squeezed his hand, and said: “We can, one day”.
It was a raw, unguarded and simple declaration of love on screen from the fan favourites who generally cackle, sip cocktails and deliver caustically comedic doses of common sense on the reality show, which observes Aussie families watching and talking about TV.
Viewers flooded Wayne and Tom’s social media accounts with messages of support, reinforcing a love they had felt since joining Gogglebox six seasons ago.
Before the show first aired, they had been warned by psychologists that as a gay couple on TV, they may cop hate from the viewing public.
“They forecast we’d be hammered on social media, but it was the reverse,” says Tom.
“We were accepted. We got nothing but love from this country and we felt fantastic.”
‘To be told we can’t be good parents is heartbreaking. We’ve raised three well-accomplished children into adults,’ say Wayne and Tom. Picture: Channel TenSource:Supplied
But the darlings of Gogglebox say that all changed when the Federal Government announced its postal survey on same-sex marriage.
‘THIS CAMPAIGN HAS BEEN HORRIBLE’
They’ve copped abuse and hate from “keyboard warriors” and No voters since the survey went public. “This campaign has been horrible,” says Tom.
“I will never ever, ever forgive our government for putting us through this.”
“From the moment this survey was announced we have had the most horrible, nasty things said to us.
“And it has really upset me. I think back to being at school, and the bullying and the things that have happened in my life ... all these people who picked on me now get to decide is my relationship as equal as theirs.
“These hate-filled people get to decide whether my love of him is the same, or as acceptable, as theirs.
“When I met Wayne I was a single parent with three kids. I fought hard to be accepted for who I was and feel strong enough to make sure that my children grew up to be wonderful, contributing adults, and that’s all I cared about.”
Wayne speaks with measured fury and sadness as he reveals what hurt most was having their ability to raise kids questioned by complete strangers.
‘There’s only one person in the world that has a right to say no to marriage, and that’s the person being asked,’ says Tom. Picture: Foxtel/Gina MiliciaSource:Supplied
“To be told we can’t be good parents is heartbreaking,” he said.
“We’ve raised three well-accomplished children into adults (Jade is 27, Zac, 26 and Tegan, 24).
“It’s been really hard. I was quite fortunate with my upbringing. My parents were accepting. Tom on the other hand has had a lot of demons to wrestle which have resurfaced. Unfortunately this campaign has brought out the ugly in a lot of people.”
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT
Wayne, 47, and Tom, 49, have been together for 17 years.
They met at a country dance. Naturally, Wayne (the quieter of the two — Tom insists he is the prettier) says, Tom’s favourite song, Kylie Minogue’s Love At First Sightwas playing.
The pair were engaged in Paris in 2015.
“My joke to Wayne was always I would never marry him until he gave me a pink diamond,” says Tom, showing a ring with 15 tiny white diamonds to mark each year together ahead of the engagement, and a stunning small pink one, for the future.
They always wanted to marry when the kids were younger “to show them that stable relationships can happen,” says Tom.
“Their friends parents are divorced. Me and their mother are divorced. We wanted to show them that relationships can be fantastic.”
Wayne’s late Mum knew that. She died more than 18 months ago, holding her son’s hand, telling him she loved him and to “look after Tom”.
But there would be no substitute for an Australian wedding. They were adamant they would not marry overseas.
“It’s not a real for us until the government of the day and this country is going to recognise our relationship,” says Wayne.
“If my own country can’t recognise the value of people like us, I won’t do it.”
So if the Yes vote makes it through, they’re getting hitched — but it won’t be a huge affair.
The pair was engaged in 2015, with the ring featuring 15 white diamonds for 15 years together, and one pink one, for the future. Picture: Foxtel/Gina MiliciaSource:Supplied
“I’m going to be 50 next year, we’re looking at retirement, we want to buy a farm ... it will just be Wayne and I and the three kids and maybe a party afterwards,” says Tom.
Wayne says they won’t be first in line.
“We don’t want to just race out and do it. It is our special day and we’re only going to do it once and we want to make it nice and find the nicest place for us to be with our closest friends and celebrate our union together,” says Wayne.
“The fact that we can actually — get married — that’s the most important thing.”
FEARS FOR FUTURE
Somewhere along the line — and it was by calculated design on behalf of the No side, the pair say — the same sex marriage debate got very, very distorted.
“The debate was hijacked,” says Wayne.
“This is about civil rights, and unfortunately through all the white noise the No campaign created that was forgotten.
“You’re talking about civil rights, because if Tom was sick and I had to pull the plug, I’m legally not allowed to do it.”
“I had a heart attack and the hospital could have actually stopped Tom from coming to see me or making any decisions about me because they don’t recognise us as a couple.
“The stuff we’ve had to do for our wishes to be met as a gay couple have been phenomenal.
“Our biggest fear was always when the kids were growing up that if anything happened to Tom they could have come and taken the kids away from me.”
Both men fear a Yes vote next week will be far from the end of the debate, and the hate.
Their fears may be well-placed, with noises already coming from politicians about amendments to the proposed same-sex marriage bill.
“People think that next Wednesday is going to be the end of it. I think that it’s not. I think it’s the beginning of what we have to go through,” says Tom.
“I strongly believe in religious freedom. But religion stays as religion. And if you want to get involved in politics, start paying tax.
“There’s only one person in the world that has a right to say no to marriage, and that’s the person being asked.”
“It’s nobody else’s business.”
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