Showing posts with label Gay Blogger. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gay Blogger. Show all posts

September 12, 2016

The New “GuySexual”

I discovered a new web page today geared towards what it calls the”Guysexual.” Yes I know I hate the name too but you might find it witty and interesting, may be not. I always keep my reservations on anything new until the second serving but I figure I give you the inaugural edition.. The site is written by a gay guy living in Mumbai, India. Yes I was holding that one until my third line. It is written by an Indian guy in India but I believe that as a minority universal group we are all very much connected and we have common stories if not experiences in almost every aspect of our lives. I also believe the more we get to know about how other gays think, live and love,  the more we learn about ourselves.

As you start reading this column you might not even realize right away that is not written in the place where you call home wherever that might be. Well enjoy…

I ask a lot of questions.
Is ketchup better than mustard? Did man really walk on the moon? How do you eat crème brulee?  Will they ever resume Heroes? Should I really have that fourth cup of espresso? What’s eighteen times thirty-two? Are gay men any different than the straight ones? Does true love exist for either?
I might not know the right spoon to eat my crème brulee with, or what color shirt* goes with a leather jacket, but I do know that there never really is only the one. There’s a two, three, four, and probably more. It could work out with some of them and sometimes it won’t.

Sounds familiar?

It obviously does, because there really is no difference between gay and straight when it comes to love, sex or relationships. We all have the same worries: Who foots the bill? Do they validate me? Do they love me? Do I love them? What is love?

There are many stereotypes that exist which need to busted like the bell-bottom trend.  Gay men are not very different, we love the way everyone else does — sometimes it is intense, sometimes it is fleeting, and sometimes we’re just lusting.

Gay men come in all shapes, sizes, and colors

Do we like pink? Is Adele on loop? Are we promiscuous? Do we really lust after our best friend’s boyfriend?

There is no general-one-size-fits-all answer to any of these questions.

And it’s definitely rude to ask gay men questions like these — it’s like asking someone if they’ve ever killed somebody or whether they have something stuck between their teeth.
Here’s a friendly PSA: Gay men come in all shapes, sizes, and colours. If someone tells you they identify as gay, there’s no need to ask them whether they like Bradley Cooper or Brad Pitt (Cooper, any day). Get to know them, they are not a sum of stereotypes.

Even though we live in a world full of hipsters and millennials, coming out isn’t easy. Reality is far from the Hallmark movie that I make it out to be – every year, more and more people are pushed back into the closets to rot away with clothes that are too tight, cigarettes that are too damp and love notes that are long forgotten. Every day, more and more gay men are abandoned, disowned, and even condemned to hell. Every day, a few more gay men hate themselves for their sexuality, and a few more men shut down these doors to their closets forever.

Coming out shouldn’t be an ordeal or a celebration; it should be a regular, everyday thing — like flossing your teeth every night, or telling your friends that you are vegan, or that you don’t like Taylor Swift. (We feel for you, Calvin Harris)
That’s where the Guysexual comes in (without any invitations, because invitations are so 2008). Think of this as your quintessential guide to the secret lives of Indian gay men and other queer folk — there might not be a pop culture guidebook to being a homosexual, but this about knowing how to behave with one.

This will be a list of dos and don’ts and wills and won'ts for every question you might have regarding the friendly gay man (or men) in your neighbourhood. How do you decide who pays for the bill at the end of a meal? Do we prefer beer or mimosas? What are the things you should never ever say to someone when they come out? Is it okay to call a woman a fag hag? Do we really like brunch as much as we say we do? Why are all the hot guys gay? Why is it not a good idea to instantly try setting up a new gay friend with the only other gay person that you know?
But mostly, how can we make homosexuality mainstream — the normal? Don’t say something is ‘gay’. Don’t point at someone who dresses differently and laugh. Don’t snigger at the guy who doesn’t play cricket. Don’t say that you want a gay best friend because you think it’s cool. Don’t assume. Don’t presume, and don’t bully. 

Maybe sometime in the future, a month, a year or even in a decade’s time – every LGBT person in this country can enjoy the same privileges that a select few do. And maybe, just maybe, it won’t be a privilege, but simply a way of life by then.

Until then, I’ll need beer. And probably your number too.
*White shirts work with anything.

This space appears every week for The Guysexual
The author is a TedX speaker and a published gay writer, with an unused architect’s degree, living in Mumbai. He tweets @TheGuysexual.

March 8, 2015

Gay Singapore Blogger Gets Fine For Criticizing The Court on Gay Rights

 Alex Au Wai Pang
 A Singaporean blogger was fined S$8,000 (US$5,843) by the High Court on March 5, 2015 for writing a blog post two years ago that allegedly accused the Chief Justice of manipulating the court proceedings related to the petitions against Section 377A, the law which criminalizes sex between men.
Alex Au Wai Pang is a 62-year old writer who blogsat Yawning Bread. He is also a prominent member of Singapore's LGBT community. Alex said he will appeal the decision of the court.
The case involves an article that Alex wrote entitled“377 wheels come off Supreme Court’s best laid plans”, which discussed the “strange calendaring” of petitions challenging Section 377A in the High Court. Prosecutors said the article “unfairly suggested that the Chief Justice had acted impartially” and therefore it “risked undermining public confidence in the administration of justice in Singapore”. The court agreed with the prosecution and ruled that the article “crossed the legal boundary and constitute scandalizing contempt”.
Alex and his lawyers argued through their written submissions to the court that the article did not violate any law:
The [government] has had to twist Mr Au’s words out of context and to editorialize to impute sinister innuendo into his article where none exists. In so doing, [it] has mischievously ignored the caveats in Mr Au’s article that clearly flag out to his readers that he is theorizing, as opposed to making statements of fact.
Many criticized the decision of the Attorney General’s Chambers (AGC) to charge Alex. A statement signed by 170 people in December 2013 described the case as a threat to free speech:
The AGC’s action, rather than enhancing confidence in the judiciary, might weaken public confidence. It also implies that the public is not allowed to form opinions on judicial processes.
But the AGC reminded them that free speech is not absolute:
As important as the right to free speech and expression is, the Constitution recognizes that our society as a whole must be safeguarded against statements without basis which injure the reputation of persons or lower confidence in the administration of justice.
The case of Alex is cited by various political groups as the latest manifestation of the systematic harassment suffered by activists and critics of the government. Reacting to the court decision, the Reform Party urged the public to be vigilant about their rights:
Alex Au has already declared his intention to file an appeal. People we have to unite and fight to keep our rights, those few that we have left, if we are not to lose them for ever.
Phil Robertson, deputy Asia director at Human Rights Watch, advised Singapore to repeal the archaic law of “scandalizing the judiciary.” He also frowned upon the court decision to convict Alex:
Singapore’s courts, like any other public institution, are strengthened, not weakened, by open debate on issues of general concern. The prosecution of Alex Au for speaking out is just one more example of Singapore’s willingness to misuse law to gag its critics.
The issue should embolden Singaporeans to step up the pressure in demanding the abrogation of two colonial-era laws: Section 377A and the crime of “scandalizing the judiciary.” It should also inspire activists and other concerned citizens to broaden the campaign for greater media freedom and stronger protection of human rights.

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