I found myself in the middle of a heated debate after an article in the newspaper revealed that women do carry condoms in their handbags. While I found it within the ordinary, my friends think it is unheard of for a woman to be carry condoms. “It is very abnormal, carrying condoms is a man’s job,” said one.
“I could never take condoms from a female. In fact I would run for my life is she offered me some” said another
I do not want to get into the religious squabble on condom use or the morality of premarital sex, the issue here is who should be in charge of carrying these gadgets? In this era sex is as normal as breathing and the prevalence of HIV/Aids tells it all. I see nothing wrong with a woman carrying some protection after all we all know that people are having extra marital and premarital sex.
When I was in my early 20s, I automatically thought it was the man’s responsibility, I even remember at the university; the authorities had placed them in the bathrooms and taped them in the hallways. My girls and I would grab a handful in jest and make fun; we’d shyly laugh at the idea of having condoms all over like we never used them.
Those days rubber was stigmatised and associated with the bad girls and no one wanted to be labelled one.
While the rubbers in the men’s hostel were refilled once in a while, the ones in the women’s hostel stayed intact for the whole semester.
Fast forwards to today, rubbers are the norm of the day and one is not ashamed to buy some over the counter, but stash some in the handbag and you are labelled a whore. Who decided that only men can carry rubber around and women can’t? It really takes two to tango, doesn’t it?
How many times have you been in a situation where you are hot and bothered that you just can’t take it to the next level just because none of you bothered to carry a condom?
It is in the heat of such moments that your will is tested. Sometimes a cool head prevails but not in all occasions otherwise we would not have all these unwanted pregnancies and STDs going around.
I don’t walk with condoms because you just don’t know who might go through your handbag. However, I’ve had this discussion with several of my female friends, they think the man should always be the provider, this makes me ask, and why should one make their health somebody else’s responsibility?
It’s like moving heavy furniture. If there’s no man around, I’ll do it. If there is a man, I will expect him to; it’s the least he can do. In the heat of the arguments my pals and I were able to come up with silent rule of engagement when it comes to carrying the protection which I will gladly share with you.
If you invite someone for dinner at your house, you do not expect them to carry their own food. It is only logical that the host provides the meal and the same should apply to condoms. If you are in a neutral ground like a hotel, the prospect of something happening might have already been addressed, so you each carry one. I mean it’s just better to be safe than sorry.My advice to you is that regardless of how you handle condom, don’t get caught without protection.
Christine Chacha
The Citizen...
actup.org
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