Gay Ex Basketball Player Talks About Kobe & Homophobia In Sports
John Amaechi, who played professional basketball from 1995 to 2003, including five seasons with three NBA teams, came out as gay to the mainstream after his playing career ended. The 6-10 center-forward wrote a book, Man in the Middle, about being a gay professional athlete. Close friends and some teammates knew of Amaechi's sexuality during his basketball career. He is now a psychologist working in the USA and Britain.
Amaechi spoke to USA TODAY NBA reporter J. Michael Falgoust about Los Angeles Lakers guard Kobe Bryantusing an expletive-filled homophobic slur directed at NBA referee Bennie Adams during Tuesday's game against the San Antonio Spurs. The NBA fined Bryant $100,000, and he explained his choice of words as "frustration during the heat of the" nationally televised game.
Amaechi also reacted to the incident earlier this season when two Toronto Raptors teammates were vilified for holding hands as they walked off the court.
Q: What was your first impression when you heard Bryant's remark?
A: I'm surprised that people are surprised. This is common language when I played. It was an everyday word that I heard. I haven't seen anything new put in place (by the NBA) to tackle homophobia. There's no reason for it to somehow get better.
Q: And what do you think of Bryant's statement of "apology"?
A: I suppose that's the typical, "I apologize if you're offende"' type of comment. I doubt very much when he said that that he thought Bennie was a pile of sticks. There's only one contemporary meaning for that.
The problem we have now is because of the way we don't address homophobia, the ultimate insult to a man is to tell them either they're like a woman or worse, that they're gay.
We have to take it as unacceptable as a white person screaming the N-word at a black person. … I can tell you that I've been called a f——- fairly routinely, and yet people seem to hold off on calling me the N-word. We've got to mirror that progress.
Q: Then you're on board with organizations such as GLAAD and the Human Rights Campaign, which didn't think the penalty was sufficient?
A: I'm not interested in seeing Kobe punished. What I'm interested in is if you're really sorry, that this is a one-off mistake for you, use the power you have to make a difference. That means a proper apology and doing something with his brand. Good Lord, he's got the power with one executive decision to get people moving and do something good here. Do something good.
I've said this before and I know people think it's hyperbole, but especially in America, people look at sports stars like their gods. I keep saying every time, "If sports stars are gods it's time we see a miracle every once in a while." This is an opportunity for that.
Q: If you were the NBA commissioner, how would you have punished Bryant?
A: There would certainly be a fine. I'd like to know what the response would be if a white and gay player had called Kobe a n-----. My concern is that the penalty axed on that player would be greater than this penalty.
But at the same time, what I would want is to encourage Kobe to use the power he has to really make an apology that means something. Tell black men, men in general in America, that resorting to that sort of language is the lowest of the low and is unacceptable. And it doesn't make you any more of a man. That's really the answer. Saying you didn't mean it is not the answer.
Q: Do you think the remark makes Bryant homophobic?
A: The reason it's difficult is because of how influential he is. When he talks, not just young people but sports fans in general listen. They mimic. He sets a tone that says, "This is acceptable language when you are frustrated." It isn't acceptable language. That's the larger extent of the damage. That's like a Glenn Beck non-apology. With a few more words well-chosen he could do some good.
I don't think he is any more homophobic than the average person, or most certainly your average person in sports. When you're in the spotlight, when a camera is trained on your face on a daily basis, you don't have the luxury of losing control. When you do, I like to see people be a little more contrite than that.
Q: Does this discourage an NBA player who might ponder coming out to his team from doing so?
A: Let's face it, any gay teammate he has, any gay player playing on a team that he plays against is now, as they were before probably, critically aware that the ultimate insult that someone uses to put someone down is talking about you. That does want to make you take a step back and think again about whether you want to really open yourself up to that extra animosity.
I'm not interested in equality for any kind of warm and fuzzy reason. I'm in psychology now. I'm interested in performance. The fact is, if you've got teams of these numbers, it is unlikely that there is not someone around him — whether it be coaching staff, auxiliary staff, support staff, medical staff or a teammate — who is lesbian, gay or bi. When you use language like that you're pulling your team apart even if it's just your support staff.
Photo By Chris Goodney, Bloomberg News
Photo By Chris Goodney, Bloomberg News
By J. Michael Falgoust, USA TODAY
http://www.usatoday.com/
Former NBA center-forward John Amaechi, who came out as gay after his career, is now a psychologist based in the USA and Britain.
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