I am a College Student and Will Kick Balls For Money

This story was written by Dan Savage. I have the greatest respect for him and I hope that he forgives me for editing his story. As a matter of fact knowing Dan and the type of person he is, I see no problem. I needed to edit the story to fit my readership, I know the people that read my blog and I know what they like. When I am not able to give what my readers want is because there are no true real stories that are compelling enough for the publisher to accept. The only stories we published are real, we also careful between the editorial and the way the news is been reported by neutral sources. Also the advice that Dan gives is his, not mine.  I might agree or not with him. In any case I would have structure then response in a different way. Adam for adamfoxie*

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I am a 22-year-old gay male student. I used to babysit for a wealthy family, but their boys have outgrown babysitters and tutors. The dad is very into martial arts/fighting and has invited me over for "self-defense training." I have accepted his invitations a few times, and it has always started off as a normal workout in their home gym, but he is always anxious to get to the self-defense part. Often he will blindfold me and then come at me, and I must then wrestle my way out of the situation using the moves I've learned.

I did this a few times, Dan, but I found it a bit unsettling. However, he never touched me inappropriately. Last time, he told me he wanted to see how much pain he could take. He asked me to kick him in the groin with no protection until he couldn't take it anymore. I thought, "This is strange," but I was curious, so I did it. He was able to take it for a surprisingly long time. I haven't been back since, but for the last six months, he has been pestering me to come back. Recently, he suggested that we have a "competition." He will stand there, and I will kick him in the balls, or anywhere else I want. If he gives up, I get $150. If I give up, by getting too tired, I give him $20. His wife knows about the workouts, but he said he doesn't want me to tell her about the fighting.

My question is this: Is there a sexual component to this? I have never heard of anything like this before, and I find it odd. But I am a poor college student, and for $150, I'll stand there fully clothed and kick this guy in the balls! Please let me know your thoughts.

Will Kick Balls For Money

There are no nonsexual components to this, WKBFM, and if you've never heard of something like this before, well, you must be a new reader.

What we've got here is a rich guy attempting to manipulate his kids' former babysitter into doing sex work for him — no, scratch that. What we've got here is a rich guy who has already manipulated his kids' former babysitter into doing sex work for him, WKBFM, and that's pretty fucking creepy. (Your previous workouts with the blindfolds and the wrestling and the kicking? Unpaid sex work.) Don't get me wrong: I don't think his ball-busting fetish is creepy. It's extreme, as fetishes go, and there are definitely risks. But the risks are his. Paying you to kick him in the nuts doesn't put his wife at risk (swift-kick-to-sack is not a known mode of STI transmission), it won't take food out of his children's mouths, and, as he presumably has all the children he wants, ball-busting-induced sterility might be a blessing/vasectomy in disguise.

If you need the money, WKBFM, and you don't think you'll be scarred by the experience, tell the rich guy you'll consider doing this for him — you'll come over, remain fully clothed, and kick him in the nuts — but only if he levels with you: He's getting off on this. If he can't level with you, don't do this.

You don't want this rich asshole to think he's successfully manipulated you into doing sex work for him, because once the session is under way, you don't want him thinking, "Well, if I could get him to do this, I can probably get him to [remove his clothes, watch me masturbate, have sex with me]." If you go into a ball-busting session without both of you having acknowledged what you're actually doing — you're sorta selling sex, he's definitely paying for sex — and he does try to get you to remove your clothes or watch him masturbate or have sex with him, you may find it difficult to say no. Being direct with someone ("No, I'm not taking my clothes off, asshole!") after you've accepted a dishonest premise ("Sure, rich guy, this isn't about sex, you're just testing yourself!") requires you to admit that you were being dishonest, too. Most people are reluctant to admit to dishonesty, and a skilled manipulator will exploit that inhibition to get what he wants.

So tell him you'll play — you'll bust his balls — but you're not going to play along. He has to admit that this is about sex and he has to agree to honor your conditions: Everything that happens is agreed to in advance, he remains fully clothed, you remain fully clothed, no recordings are made, and you get the $150 — make that $250 — whether or not he bails when you kick him hard in the balls.