Wedding Postpone Because of Insults Finally Takes Place
Coronado residents and merchants have banded together in an extraordinary effort to save a wedding, and maybe even the city’s reputation.
A “do-over” wedding is scheduled Oct. 11 at one of the city’s fanciest hotels for a gay couple whose August nuptials in one of Coronado’s bayside parks were marred by a heckler shouting hateful slurs.
The goal of the second ceremony is giving the couple a more positive experience and showing that Coronado is a welcoming community where discrimination won’t be tolerated.
“The people of Coronado, who said they wouldn’t tolerate what happened to us, have created a happy ending,” said Oscar de Las Salas, who will marry Gary Jackson again next week. “We never expected this. It’s incredible.”
Leaders of the region’s gay and lesbian community said Thursday that the outpouring of support from such a wide cross section of Coronado shows the military town isn’t as conservative as its image. They said it also strengthens San Diego County’s reputation as one of the most welcoming places in the world for lesbians, gays and bisexuals.
The aggressive rallying on behalf of a gay couple, which has been a hot topic on Facebook and message boards focused on gay rights, is also a sign of the times, community leaders said. Gays have not only won the right to get married, but now the public won’t tolerate it when someone fails to respect that right, they said.
“A decade ago we wouldn’t have had same sex marriages here, much less this kind of response to a same-sex wedding gone wrong,” said Stephen Whitburn, executive director of San Diego Pride.
Coronado residents and city leaders have called the heckling, which police said Thursday they’re investigating as a possible hate crime, an isolated and unusual incident.
“The hateful shouts of one person should not serve as a representation of how our community as a whole behaves,” Mayor Casey Tanaka, who is scheduled to officiate next week’s do-over wedding, said Thursday. “I’m happy our city has a chance to make things right.”
That was the goal of four young Coronado women who have spearheaded planning for the event, said attorney Alisa Kerr, a member of the foursome.
“Their wedding being marred by some jerk is such an inaccurate reflection of the community and the kindness we have here for everybody,” she said.
“We were planning at first to just throw them a little party, but the whole community has been so generous that we’re really going to be able to show them how awesome Coronado is.”
Loews Coronado Bay Resort donated a 300-seat venue, Coronado’s Blue Bridge Hospitality restaurant chain will supply the food, Coronado Cupcakery is handling the wedding cake and Vigilucci’s Ristorante contributed champagne for the toast, Kerr said. Many other local restaurants and merchants have also made contributions, she said.
“It’s insane how much they’re donating,” said Kerr, whose planning partners are Rita Alipour, Kate Blumenthal and Cerissa McPartlin Kieffer. “I mean a Loews wedding on a Saturday — I have no idea how much that would cost.”
Brian Johnson, managing director for Loews Coronado, said it was an easy decision when his staff heard about the circumstances.
“For us, it’s really an honor to take part,” he said, estimating that such a wedding would typically cost between $15,000 and $20,000.
Jackson and de Las Salas called the outpouring of support they’ve received remarkable.
“We’re excited this group of people are showing us there is not homophobia in Coronado,” de Las Salas said Thursday. “These people are standing up against that little heckler who tried to destroy our day.”
The heckler, who witnesses say shouted “go home homos” and other gay slurs, was hiding on the balcony of an upscale condominium on the edge of Centennial Park, an area open to the public that extends from San Diego Bay to First Street in Coronado.
De Las Salas, who lives with Jackson in Phoenix but visits San Diego frequently, said he was surprised the heckling happened in this part of the country.
“We chose Coronado without hesitation because it’s California, one of the most open and inclusive states,” he said. “I wouldn’t be as surprised if we had been in Iowa or Idaho or some other states.”
The scene at the August wedding was awkward and upsetting, said David De Alva, who played live music at the event.
“Everyone started fidgeting when we first heard it — we all just hoped it would stop,” De Alva said Thursday. “It was in the background but it was loud enough to hear. The guy sounded a little drunk and it was clear he wanted what he was saying to be heard.”
Lea Corbin, community relations director for the Coronado Police Department, said police have a few more witnesses to interview before they decide whether the heckling was a hate crime.
She said one factor that might make a prosecution tough is that no one heard the man say anything threatening. Another problem is that no one has been able to identify the man or exactly which condo balcony he was on, she said.
Kerr said extra precautions are being taken to prevent hecklers from marring the do-over wedding. She noted that Loews Coronado has significantly more security than a public park.
But Kerr said she doubts the heckling would happen again no matter where in Coronado the second wedding was held.
“There’s great tolerance in Coronado because there’s so much diversity,” she said. “We have military people stationed here from all over the country and tourists come here from all over the world.”
Maureen Steiner, a gay Coronado resident who organized an “Out in Coronado” event for local gays more than 20 years ago, agreed with Kerr.
“Because of the military presence, many of our residents are well-educated and have had worldly experiences," Steiner said. “They’ve seen up close real discrimination, poverty and hardship.”
david.garrick@utsandiego.com (619) 269-8906 @UTDavidGarrick
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